I feel like it's been an eternity since I last posted... but here it is only Tuesday.  Saturday I caught up with Beff and Slips (finally) for us to celebrate our birthdays and I got to play w/ the no longer super wee little Puddy-puddy.  Sunday was then Doug and Gail's wedding!  I have to admit, this was probably the most fun I've had at a wedding in a long time.  They mostly end up just being a bit somber and depressing for me, but the Schmou-4 kept me moving and I've even got sore pecks from swinging kiddos around!

Tonight was a quick turn around and back out the door to spend some time with Mithy and Miss Addie and some incredibly yummy Applebees.  I feel like I've been quite the busy gal with little time left in the evenings.

Been faithfully walking, still not seeing any weight dropping, go figure.  Just started up another exercise tracking thing at work on Monday, so I am encouraged to go a little further/longer each night, hopefully it will help.  Other than that there is just work work work... been waking up a bit before the alarm and thus in a little early (today thanks to Saf yacking first thing) and working through lunch (yesterday snagging chinese - yum) to try and get further for my upcoming deadline/cut.  Noting both the Applebees and chinese comments kind of screams why I am not dropping weight, right?

Received a bit of good news this week, buying me until the end of September before I need worry immensely.  That additional coverage at least makes the piss me off factor today a little easier to swallow.  My doctor called in a script that didn't have a generic, so it autoprocessed and shipped along with a $120 bill for a 90 days supply.  Boo.   Any other time I'd get a prescription and they'd shove the generic down my throat to the point that I didn't even always get the same thing each refill.  Now they say there isn't a generic... but yet their website does suggest one as a viable option.  WTH.

I cheated on Friday and didn't go for a walk, that was my gift to myself.  The one day off from walking was enough to leave Saffy so wound up that she was digging in the yard repeatedly on Saturday.  I was about ready to knock the fuzzy out of her and refused to take her for a walk on Saturday as well - instead I went with D, who, as I was afraid she would be, seemed to be a bit stiff on Sunday.  I think she's no longer on my walking companion card.  Of course, on Saturday I snapped and made a bit of cake and circumvented the ongoing walks anyhow.  But it was my birthday damnit, a girl with a blog partially named for cake should get a little bit of it on such an occasion.
 
Got to visit w/ Angela for a wee bit this weekend as she stopped in to return a loaned item, Kirkus for ice cream (more evil and decadance I shouldn't have allowed), and mom.  Despite it being a bit of a depressing weekend, it was a good one as far as they go.  I could still use a few extra hours every week.

There are 4 things someone can bring up that will rip me to shreds and make me beat myself up...
1).  How dumb I am... which, despite great effort remains the same.
2).  How fat I am... which I've been trying to work on and I just can't get back where I want to be.
3).  How ugly I am... which obviously, the years don't help... which brings me to...
4).  How old I am... and yet, here it comes again.

I think it was pretty mean for a friend to bring up #1, even joking, while I'm mentally already struggling with #4.  Yes, I know I'm dumb, I know I'm not as smart as you.

...and, people don't understand why I'm snapped at the prospect of less than 3 weeks of tasking remaining and saving and not wanting to do anything.  What they don't see is that if it happens, I know it's going to take me back a good 10 years to a really really bad time.  Thinking about it puts me damn near into a panic attack.  It makes it hard to breathe and it even makes me wonder what other two things will happen to make it the second worst point in time in my life.  At least I am still confident it can't top that other time frame.  The worse part is that _this place_ was my backup.  I'm here... I don't have another backup.  Where does that leave me?

Dear Amazon, the plans to implement a sales tax for PA in Sept means only two things.  1).  I need the funding situation resolved quickly so I can do my Christmas shopping before then and 2).  After Sept, 2012 I will be buying significantly less from your company as I start to see less 'better deals'.  I will miss you.

The good news today is that I got a call stating I was awarded one of the new scholarships that we've implemented at work, for a program I was looking at to go after a second master's degree.  This doesn't do much for the larger issue at hand, but I am seeing it as a victory, even if I can't follow through with it.  It's definitely a program I can't get through on my own funding.

I'm finding it hard to find motivation to make dinner tonight, much less prep for a walk.  If the heavy rain storms keep up I don't know how far I'll get anyhow.  I'm on such a roll though that I can't afford to miss a night.

Motivation took hold suddenly this morning.  I can proudly say the hallway is finally repainted.  It has been sitting, waiting for attention since the kitchen was finished which has been quite a while ago at this point.  A little fear of no work and a need to sell a house got that job off of the to do list in under 2 hours.  Why on earth did I put it off so long?

For the record they shouldn't call the painter's tape "low tack" - I think "no tack" is more accurate.

I haven't caught up on my sleep just yet... I did get a decent cut of a resume together, need to work my bullets a little more, but I'll go to that at some point soon.  I've been trying to think things through a good bit.  I know that there isn't much around here and despite the worry and huge obstacle that selling the house feels like I know things will come together.  Heck, I might even end up back in the south if a couple of my leads come through.  The only downer there is not being near mum.

My other task for this weekend is to get through some .NET materials.  I won't be an expert, but at least I can prove to myself that I've still got technical abilities in addition to being exceedingly well rounded when compared to other people who hold the same title.

The weather has cooled and it looks like we're in for a string of rain.  I've been doing pretty good about walking, the cooler weather can only help that endeavor.  One perk if I did end up without a job I know I could get a lot more exercise time in!

Ended up cancelling the bug guy after being told only a few more were seen/caught.  I did still swing by Home Depot tonight to pick up some supplies to do it myself... of course, they didn't have too much in the brand a friend highly recommended.  Instead I bought a little bit of other stuff and I'm placing an order from their website, since they'll ship it for free.  If nothing else, having addl ant supplies here will guarantee they'll go away.  So, less than $100 for supplies vice the $265. That helps.

I spread what I did get and pulled some weeds as they were getting a bit out of control.  The a quick bite and sit down... here it is 7 already.  I still need to walk, which should be pleasant - it's cooled off a good bit and it just rained (maybe I'll get to spot a rainbow).  From there some quality time on a resume and hopefully to bed early?  Please?

31 days if the situation doesn't change.  That means the estimate for tree trimming I just got is not going anywhere.  Bad enough I have to spend a couple hundred to deal with ants right now.  It feels like a time bomb.

Had a great day yesterday, despite the weather turning on us a bit and forcing us back into the house for most of the time - a bit crowded but at least air conditioned!  I had a blast with G, T, A, and C - they're such good kids.  The only bummer about a get together is that when they're done there is a bit of a depression.  I guess like anything the build up just drops once it comes and goes then there is the post clean up, which I'm not as eager to tackle as I am the pre-event clean up.

Lots of left over food (no surprise there), so I know what I'll be eating for a few days (nothing like a left over hot dog and carrot slaw for breakfast).  The good news there is no time lost to cooking, so I have no excuse (except the heat) to not get a walk in.  I haven't done so since Thursday night, so it's time to get back on board.  My feet are pretty achy today, telling me I was on my feet a lot more than I realized yesterday.  I'm hoping today's walk with stretch the aches back out.

Started a little research to update my Bermuda notes for the NEXT vacation... always need a next one to look forward to and Bermuda is always a great choice.  Escape, sweet escape.

Still awake... not so much going strong, but I did get a good bit done.  Load of laundry started earlier is out, as are two others.  Carrot slaw, couscous salad, mudslide brownies, lemon bars, sun tea, and dip are made.  Veggies are washed and ready.  I'm a bit bushed but Saffy didn't get her walk, so she's about bouncing off of the walls right now.  If it wasn't so freaking hot out there still (barely under 80) I wouldn't be as resistant to a quick walk with her.

Go figure they're calling for some unpredictable weather tomorrow.  I know it will wait until after I get up tomorrow and clean seats and tables off out back.

I had a good 4th with mom and visiting an aunt and uncle for a (very yummy) indoor cookout meal, but the day ran a bit long and I didn't get a ton done at the house as I had planned.  I did at least get my grocery run in.  From there I spotted the 'trees' starting to grow in the front gutter so I told myself "quit being a baby and go climb up there".  Yea, that lasted all of 5 minutes once I was up there.  I could get the very end where there is a little more roof on the side but my nerve disappeared quickly and the other 19 feet or so remain jam packed.  Why does it have to be so high up?!
 
Last night I slacked too - catching up w/ my Mars-bar after work for a quick drink and sushi, running home long enough to suck the dog fur up in the basement and bleach-scrub the floor, then back out the door for a good walk w/ Mrs. Schmou.  It's been pretty freaking hot, so I got a good sweat going.  Back to the house and through the shower and back out on a whim to catch Spiderman.  Home after midnight... meh.  Started a load of laundry this morning before leaving the house so I have that started already today!
 
Tonight - no options, cleaning must recommence, food prep must be tackled, and last minute prep for a post-4th shindig needs put in order so my Saturday morning isn't torture.  After such little sleep last night, we'll see how much of a second wind I have.

SQUEEE

Bedroom carpet rug-scrubbed!

I decided to invite a few ppl over next Saturday, so I will need to keep on cleaning and getting things in order through the week.  The biggest challenge - chairs for out back.  I've wanted to buy a new table and chairs for the deck, but it's just one more thing to cover and (try to) keep clean.  Undecided.

I woke up this morning a bit motivated, which is a mighty good thing.  I did lots of the basic cleaning, but then also stepped it up midway through, clearing some things out of the dining room, vacuuming in the corners and nooks and pulling out the rug scrubber.  So the dining room carpet is as clean as it is going to get.  I should probably do the bedroom carpet too.  Maybe my motivation will hold out tomorrow... maybe.

I still have stinky running around, who was incredibly displeased with me Friday night when she got a bath under the hose.  Even with deskunker she's still gone a bit of an unwelcoming tone to her, so she's been spending a majority of her time outside or in the basement, which she's fine with so long as the two meals come on time.

I was going to take the old tv stand to a place that sells used furniture today, but fortunately I called first.  They already have several tv stands and she wants to see a picture first.  That said, I guess it's not going anywhere.  I suppose when the apartment opens back up I'll trade it out for the crappy stand that is over there.

I celebrated my motivation by pulling a few folks together and heading to Rey's for some yummy chicken fajitas and then accompanied a few folks to see Ted.  I actually enjoyed it!  I didn't expect much given the previews, but I guess if I had realized Seth MacFarlane was involved I would have known to expect a little more.  I do wonder how many little kids are begging to see it given that there is a teddy bear in the previews.  Definitely not for them!