I had a release to get out last week.  There was a few hiccups so I racked up hours a bit earlier in the week.  It was enough that my Friday didn't require evening hours and my Saturday was off.  I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am that I didn't have to work on Saturday.

While it went back to a chilly rain on Saturday night - and lasted all through today - Saturday was perfect.  I even ended up getting a little bit of sun on my feet.  Avery and I spent a good chunk of time out back earlier in the day and out front later in the day.  There was lots of swinging, sliding, and cuddling, we had a great day.  It did my heart good. Maybe it was getting fresh air, but I think it had something to do with legit bonding time away from my phone and the TV.  I see the value in it, and I want to make it happen more and more - even after the virus is long gone.  I'm tired of running around during my non-work hours and rushing to get things done.  Sitting around and doing nothing but watching her have fun was worth a million bucks.

Another first for me... I actually paid for content!  I joined the "Mug Club" (Steven Crowder) today.  Admittedly the quarantine promotion code saving me $30 did it, but I have been enjoying the free extra videos they've had available through April.

and with that... the Kia is paid off. Yay for extra funds to now route to the mortgage!

Last night I managed to get a good vacuuming downstairs too!  It felt good.  How sad is that?  I've itched to have the time others do right now to do a full purge of their closets etc, but hours are simply not on my side.

I had a couple of conference calls today that required only of me to listen other than one small comment or two.  As such I took the opportunity to snap and get some quarantine cleaning and organizing done while I tuned in!  Finally the pantry has liner on the rest of the shelves (I previously only did the top one).  Even the floor in there was scrubbed.  Everything in there is reorganized and duplicate items went downstairs.  But I didn't just pile it down there... tonight after Avery went to bed, since I had already planned to skip out on my extra evening hour of work, I went down and got things in order on the food shelves down there!  I feel so good to have achieved something here.

My reward is a nice creamy toasted almond mixed drink

Now I'm really itching.  I want more bins for under my bed so I can move my sweatshirts and clear some space in my closet.  I want to get those shelves lined too.

Aside:  remember the new dishwasher?  I couldn't figure out what the heck the "issue" was with it - the dishes are always still dripping wet, even when I run it at night and set it to night dry.  I finally pulled out the manual and thought "derp" what... how?  there isn't a heating element and it relies on circulating the hot air from the hot water to dry the dishes.  How on EARTH does that work?  Well, it doesn't.  When the hot hell did this become a thing?  Ugh. So now I have to have somewhere to put many of these dishes so they can finish drying after they're washed.

Happy Easter world.  This year definitely was not like any other. We stayed home, no shock there.  I admit, it was refreshing to have a holiday that didn't involve a rush to get something made and get out the door only to return home wiped out.

I did start cooking shortly after we got up, and had a brownie for breakfast - a lovely treat for Avery and I from my sister. The ham went on, which I was lucky enough to get in a last minute curbside pickup, then I started to make the broccoli-mushroom casserole.  I had to modify that recipe since I didn't have everything, but it turned out okay.  I previously cooked beets and made pickled eggs. There was a can of cranberries and a caesar salad, and finally rolls "fresh" from a tube.

After I put the ham bone on to simmer me some ham broth for the freezer.  Later in the day Avery and I made some pillsbury sugar cookies with the easter bunny on them and for a late dinner some potato skins.  It was a good day for food, for sure.  Yesterday I made haluski with some extra to freeze.  Either way I have plenty of food to eat off of without cooking more meals that will save me some time this week

We did watch a church service and had time to go for a walk and play outside.  The weather waffled back and forth between the sun and overcast, but no rain fell.  I did stay offline from work for the day although I have plenty that I need to do there.  It will wait for me, guaranteed.

This starts the first week that doesn't appear to be easier to get my 40 in.  It's okay, I have to use some vacation time before July or I'd lose it, but I still hate burning vacation.  Stop complaining.  I'm just grateful that there is a check every two weeks, many aren't so lucky as of late.

I just queried for the payoff amount on my vehicle and set up the last payment through my bank.  Kind of anticlimactic given that we have nowhere to drive to these days.  I had drug the payment out further than I initially wanted to simply because the rate was so low and it made sense to put more towards the mortgage instead.  Either way there will be some extra slush fund for now.  I'd like to put it towards the mortgage as well, but for now - maybe just add to the greater slush fund, just in case.

This weekend was the first one I felt like I did something 'extra'.  You know, the stuff most normal people would achieve given the circumstances, but I can't easily do when doing the whole job thing and Mom thing - at least not without loosing sleep.

I gave myself Saturday off since I had my hours in for last week.  It was what I needed to get a little bit of oomph today.  My accomplishments today, in addition to getting some work time in, includes making some deviled eggs, going through Avery's clothes to pull stuff that is too small and to prepare new clothes that should fit now and into the warmer weather, vacuuming upstairs, two loads of laundry (they're even away), a nice palm sunday meal with slow cooker pork roast, mashed potatoes, and corn casserole.  That's no where near enough, but I feel good about it - so yay me.

Tonight I've lost most of the evening trying to checkout on Giant Eagle to get my next food order lined up.  I snagged a slot right after 8 but wasn't able to get it to check out, so at 9:30 (yep I tried for the full hour and a half) I lost my slot.  Looping back around I grabbed another slot - surely one someone else lost due to a similar issue - and I've been trying to check out since. It gets to the point where it validates my credit card and then it sits, spinning.  In about 20 minutes I'll lose this slot too.  How long do I keep trying?

I admit, I really want the ham that is in that cart.  I know I don't need ham for next Sunday to be Easter, but I sure want that little salty slice of normalcy.

It's weird here without Dani.  Getting to bed is faster, there is less cleaning up messes, but that too has a sadness to it.  Saffy is definitely down.  She hasn't eaten much.  We've been cuddling in bed for a little while each night - just like the old days.  I need it as much as she does.

Danika Nicole, Dani, Nik-Nic, Neener, Banany...
She was born on August 14, 2005, but I didn't bring her home until just before her 2nd birthday - at that time, named Rosetta.  She was at PAWS in State College, having just given birth to her second litter of puppies.  Apparently, she was seized from her first owner along with a male.  When he came to pay the fine and get the male a period of time later he said they could keep her, that he "never liked her anyhow" (this guy is clearly a jerk and an idiot, but I digress).  When she came home with me you could still feel every bone in her back and she had some food issues (some aggression with other dogs and counter surfing) along with a delicate tummy (this she never fully got past).  I can't blame her for the food issues, she knew what it was like to be hungry.

While many assumed she was named for the NASCAR driver *sigh* the truth is, she was named after the sarcastic vampire Danica Talos in the Blade III movie.  (Yes, I was loving that movie at the time, hence the Tiburon which was also purchased within the same period was named after another vampire in the film.)

She proved herself to be a sweet sweet girl immediately.  Every day for a long time when I came home from work she would cry and lean into my legs in the back yard looking up at me - just so happy I came home.  I think this is yet another testament to how poor her first life was.

My dark red and white blue eyed baby had a tail pretty much slung straight back except when she started to act like a propeller - that tail would spin in circles.  It was a mighty fluffy tail with a bit of white at the end, which coupled with her red/white coloring reminded me a little of a fox.

I didn't have her long before some teeth began to crack and break off.  I'm pretty sure she messed them up pretty good trying to escape whatever enclosure she was in in her first life.  My belief stems from the fact that Dani could bust out of any crate.  I don't know how she had the strength, but she'd bend the doors or bars inward and eventually get out of anything I tried to contain her in at any point in time.  She was tough - which made it hard to see her getting weak as she grew older.

She and Vixen didn't get along well, so her arrival began the separation mitigation years including a self made "wall" in the middle of the basement to give them both a little bit of private space.  It was always a challenge, but I worked hard to keep them both happy and out of one another's hair.  To be fair, she tried to get Vixen to play when she first came home, but Vix wasn't having it.  Now Safyre on the other hand... I wasn't sure who was "the problem" in the Dani/Vixen relationship for a long time.  When I saw Saffy on the Huntingdon Humane Society's listings I took Dani with me to meet her.  After a brief introduction at the gate they were in the play area together and getting along perfectly.  Danika was thrilled to have someone to play with.  Saffy came home and so began their sisterhood.

Through the years...

• She never did a great job of not making a mess if she needed to go.  But things definitely got worse as she got older to a near daily occurrence.  I guess it happens to most of us.  On one hand I'm lucky that it was her poo she had a harder time holding instead of urine.
• Her wants were simple.  Dani was content to lay by your feet in front of the couch and on the rare occasion when she would be on the bed, there too she would remain by my feet except when called up for a cuddle.  Her cuddles were more like a hug as she'd thump down on her side on you and press in for some love.
• Her first toy when she came home that was brand new and didn't smell of anyone other than HER was a stuffed sheep.  She fell in love with sheep.  There were lambchop stuffed animals that she would gross up with slobber from squeak-squeak-squeaking incessantly.  One Christmas, Aunt Jackie had sent two toys w/o names on them.  Saffy opened the sheep first and Dani stood there looking incredibly sad as she watched Saf play with the toy.  She refused to open the other gift!  After some prompting, Saffy gave up the sheep and opened the other toy.  When Dani was handed the sheep she was overjoyed and started squeaking away.
• On the weekend in the summer she liked to go out back and lay in the sun.  When the shade would creep in she would move to the next position to keep sunning herself.
• Counter surfing was broken pretty fast and after Saffy came, food aggression too was proven to be gone.  They could stand side by side eating with maybe a grumble if someone tried to bogart, but that was about it.
• She loved her treats.  Every morning as we got up and every night as we went to bed she would stand in front of the dresser staring at me demanding a treat from the bag she knew was sitting up there.
• She was darn near toothless towards the end, but it didn't stop her from eating regular food (or from pulling at crate doors when I was still using them).
• Other than being relatively toothless and having a delicate belly, Dani was pretty healthy throughout her life.  There for a while I thought she was developing tremendous arthritis as standing took forever and looked labored.  A bit of thyroid medication and she perked right back up in no time. We had been off the medication for quite some time without further issues beyond old age slowing her down and making her struggle to get up.

Before I relocated and began working from home things got harder.  The fighting against the crate which I had been forced to use to avoid needing to clean daily (which was a nightmare when you're trying to sell a house) started to become a bloody/face marred mess.  Then she began to defecate in the crate too, which while well formed was always a little soft thanks to those ongoing stomach issues.  We're talking within a couple of hours, not a full day, so running home at lunch often meant needing to clean a second time each day instead of avoiding a mess.

Since we moved I've noted a distinct decline.  She seems to have lost a good bit of hearing and she seems a little out of it/senile.  Dani remains friendly and delicate though.  She's also been a good dog with regard to having a human baby sister around the house.  The only risk there is that Dani isn't too attentive of where she steps, often resulting in her kicking toys and stomping on things - fortunately, not the wee one.

My vet has said it numerous times:  it is very rare that they pass on their own of "old age".  Eventually it becomes simply too much for one reason or another (too much on them with a problem they're suffering or too much on the owner).  This has been on my mind for quite some time and with the things going on in our world (coronavirus) the worries of the timing loom even larger.  I've been trying to do things for her to make her happy and show her the love that I have forgotten to offer as the busyness of life has gotten in the way.

Lately she's struggled more to get her feet back under her to get up, but usually after a bit of banging around on the french doors or a gentle nudge from my hand or foot as she struggled to stand she managed.  On the 31st around dinner time she had another bout struggling to get up.  I tried to help her and she wasn't quite holding her balance well.  I got her comfortable and encouraged her to relax a bit, figuring that she just tired herself out and would feel better soon (this has happened before).

Come bedtime she still couldn't stand, even with my help, to go to the bathroom.  I got her comfortable on the first floor with towels and an old dog bed - far from the carpet just in case she pottied - and hoped to see her feeling better in the morning.

Come morning there she was in the same place.  Another try outside was unsuccessful and she couldn't keep balanced at all.  I knew I had to make some calls.  For the rest of the day I kept her comfortable and when I saw or heard her attempting to get up (she'd groan) I would go get her to chill out again.  Our appointment was at 3:20, I've marked the post date/time of this blog entry to the approximate time she left us.  I then drove her to the crematory, thank God they are still open and providing services despite the coronavirus.  She will be back home in a few weeks to join Satin and Vixen, and me, here in the computer room.

Despite her rough start as a young dog Danika still lived much longer than Satin did and she had what can be considered a pretty long life, which says something.  I hope she was happy with her second life.  As I say goodbye to her, I hope that she gets to meet Satin, who was gone before she arrived.  I hope she and Vixen get along better.  I know Mom will meet her upon arrival, as I think Dani was her favorite.  Saffy, I am sure, will be missing her best buddy and I pray too that she adjusts to Danika's absence.  I pray to see you at rainbow bridge Dani.  You were a good girl.  I love you and I'm sorry.

8/14/2005 - 4/1/2020

Sadly as of now, Dani is still not able to stand or move about on her own.  Even with me holding her she isn't able to stand to go to the bathroom.  She's basically going where she is laying.  She's been napping, but periodically I hear her struggling (trying to get up) so I go out and try to get her to calm back down.  We have an appointment for later this afternoon to say goodbye.  Poor girl.