It warmed back up yesterday - we were at 66.  Sure today it is raining again and there is promise of chilly temps in the next few days, but it was good to get outside to play last night.  I also took this opportunity to wheel my 3 large black planters with potatoes in them out front.  The growth is easily 8-10 inches on some of the sprouts but very yellow (they definitely are in need of a little bit of sunlight).  I am eager for a nice stretch of weather so I can get the broccoli and cauliflower into larger pots outside - both of which seem to be doing well in the basement under the grow lights.

If you know anything about me you know I am an only child, but I also have a varying number of siblings depending on how you ask the question.  Some are newer in my life, some I have always known about, some are very close, and some are complete unknowns to me.

All that to then say, my brother passed away.  I guess he's been unwell for a while (COPD like my mother had).  He's never been good to himself.  We've never been close, I've never had a desire to be.  I saw how he (intentionally or not) hurt Mom's heart when I was younger.  He's about 4 hours away from me.  I don't know that they'll have anything for him, I don't know if I would go.  I think going to life celebrations is more for the living (your own mourning or to offer comfort to mutual loved ones - and neither of those situations really apply here).  I feel a bit heartless feeling this way.  I'm sad for his loneliness in recent years.  I'm sad for his kids and grandkids who didn't know him.

Again.  Again my failures at humor have me feeling shitty about myself.  After making what I thought was a witty reply I got the response of "always the cynic".  I'm not that bad/negative, am I?  I really was trying to make a joke.  Someday maybe I'll learn to just shut up and not say anything.  Is that possible?

Hey internet, be proud of me.  I have made some progress with 'deep cleaning' here at the house.  It isn't something the average person would see if they visited, but it makes me feel so much better.  In the past few days I have emptied all of the top cabinets and two of the lower cabinets (including the deep one that runs alongside the dishwasher), wiped down the shelves, and reorganized/inventoried/purged as I put things away.  The sink cabinet was done when we changed out the faucet.

My cabinets are always full full, but there is definitely breathing room now.  I still need to do the following lower cabinets:  tupperware and bagged snacks, the coffee/tea/booze cabinet, and the island cabinet which is my pots/pans and Avery's easy to grab snacks.

It snowed again today.  Just a dusting that disappeared and now it is dusting again.  Fortunately, I went to Church last night or I would have been angry when I remembered that we changed the clocks.  After cathecism I took to making a batch of Easter bread.  It's my Mom's recipe, but not one I've ever tried making.  I am notorious for bread not wanting to rise for me. I left it sit for 30-40 minutes each time,on top of a heated stove, and still it didn't puff like I would have expected.  It is a bit denser than hers was.  It tastes ok, it just isn't how I remember it.  I also made some quick meatballs and buccatini (per request from Avery).  Anyone else noticing that the ground beef seems to be all water?  Are they injecting it like they do chicken?  Man the meatballs shriveled up.  Literal shrink-flation.

I made final payment for one of my summer cruises yesterday - yet another sign of spring being near.

Today is all about swimming.  I filled out the paperwork for Avery to spend a few weeks at Camp Splash this summer; they do it at our local pool).  I love that they do it for so many weeks and we can sign up for numerous outside of our vacation times.  I also signed her up for another round of lessons at the high school.

I am waiting to get the dates for vacation bible school as that will fill her calendar further.  I may need to look around for another camp or two this summer.  I think it will be a good way to expose her to different things while keeping her off of the couch while I work all summer.  Can I trust her outside w/ her friends right now?  Sure, to an extent and in small doses.  I worry about the influence of one of the older girls on her and the temptation to be misled is definitely there.  Maybe next summer I will feel better about her being outside w/o my supervision.

All that to say... it's beginning.  I know once I start running in 10 different directions for her it will only "get worse", but I'm excited for her to explore the things she enjoys and find interests that she will grow in.

What a beautiful day.  Well over 70 degrees and sunny.  Windows open and the house hit 72!  I dropped off from work at 4 to enjoy and take Avery out to play with her neighborhood friends.  Fortunately I had planned ahead and the slow cooker was tending to dinner.

The flowers and blossoms are already starting.  The birds are out solo - shame on me for not reporting my first single robin sightings a few days ago, it just felt so early.

Foster boy Jackson is doing very well the past few days.  It is time for me to get his write up completed (hopefully he will find forever before the next round of trappings takes place).

Last year I had two large containers of potatoes.  This year I am going with three (stealing the one that was used for the non-producing pumpkins last year).  As I turned over the dirt I found several large potatoes. How on earth.  I had gone through them last year after the plants died off.  I guess something was left behind that ended up growing potatoes larger than anything I harvested.  Too bad they were outside to freeze the rest of the winter.  Mental note:  take a second pass on the potato buckets as it gets truly cold outside.  I put these containers in the garage for now, which gets cold, but not freezing.

I put some tomato seeds and old sweet 100 stragglers into dirt, more peppers, and some cauliflower and broccoli.  If you recall, last year I learned that I need to get the later two going very early to get them in before the heat comes.

According to my Clyde's Garden Planner I can't put the potatoes, broccoli, and cauliflower outside until ~April 7.  Hopefully by then I have little plants going.  I will wait a few weeks to do something in prep for carrots and beets.  I may want a few more large buckets -- I want more beets!

I should also note that a few of the peppers that I attempted to winter over this year appear to still be alive.  Fingers crossed.  The second grow light is now plugged in over the seeds, which will spill over giving these a bit more/extra light.

A wee bit of snow is flying this morning after a few really temperate days -- we're talking going for walks with the kid on her scooter and wondering if I needed my coat.  Yeah, yeah, it's February, ok.  The weather alert emails have been coming, which gives me anxiety since kiddo has a birthday party to attend in a few hours.

After that I am hoping to get back here and find the motivation to get a few seeds into dirt and under the grow light.  I really should have taken advantage of those nicer days to get this done outside, but I didn't think about it until just now.  I am debating between using the little plastic seed starter cups and toilet paper rolls, which I've seen as a viable "hack".  While I'm waiting for the girl to get up this morning maybe I'll start cutting some of those rolls in prep.

It's Valentine's day and the first day of Lent.  While this combination meant I didn't go Valentine myself a cake or ice cream I did get to have fish fry, yum.

Happy lent to all!  Are you doing anything special or "giving something up" for lent this year?  I'm not so much giving something up as I am hoping to use it as a reset.  There will be a cutting of daytime eating because it's way too easy to grab a pretzel or other portable munchie when I get up to stretch or put the dogs in or out X times a day.  I simply eat too much and it's showing both physically in weight and physically in my ability to be comfortable and general aches.  I sure wish they would come up with that magic pill.  Attempts at weight loss is hard and way too time consuming.

Today I am feeling old and pensive.  If it was still a thing for me, I'd think I was pms-y.  I discovered (by accident) of someone's passing (a year and a half ago) - it's a meaningful person from the past, so that has me bummed, moreso to think about how long ago it was that I could say I really knew them.

Work is in a state we used to stress through on a regular basis.  If you've ever been in a place where you feel pretty sure you're okay but you aren't 100% sure -- and you know that others may not be... well it weighs on me.

This evening in the car a song that the frat bros had on constant rotation my junior year was on the radio.  Avery recognized it - something from school that used it - and she asked me if I knew that song.  Boy it took me back to a time, a place, and all kinds of feelings.

Well it happened.  Avery dropped her first cuss word in a moment of frustration.   I have no one to blame but myself.  I haven't purged distasteful words from my vocab and they come out in my moments of irritation (messes from the dogs, idiots in traffic).  I feel horrific about it, like big time bad about it.

After she went through her penalty/timeout and apologies, I apologized to her for not doing better and asked her to tell me about it when I say things I shouldn't.  I'm hoping she can help me by keeping me honest.  I know she's destined to be a lot like me -- and there are worse people to be like -- but gosh I want her to be so much better than me.

The floors (upstairs bathrooms and laundry room) are done!  Of course in doing so they had to take the toilets out (and replace the wax ring etc).  Just that amount of time being drained and disconnected both of them decided to have issues when put back together -- go figure!  The one in Avery's bathroom was leaking from the bottom down the supply line (gasket).  The one in my bathroom needed a new flapper all of a sudden and new guts -- again.  I swear I've changed each toilet at least 2x since I moved here, this is at least the 3rd time in that bathroom.

I like it!  I like that it isn't as slick as the vinyl; my callused feet would often slip on the vinyl.  I like their work.  But most of all, I like the way it looks.  I guess writing my end of year posts does get in my head, for good.

School was, in fact, cancelled on Friday.  Blizzard packet #3 is now complete.  The good news is it is a bit warmer and there was enough snow for Avery to go play w/ a few neighbor friends last night.  I knew her boots were an 11, but I was hoping they would still work this year.  That's a big no.  Can I just say that kid's snow boots are inordinately expensive for all the more often they get to be worn?  I online ordered a pair from our favorite consignment store, so we just have to run and snag them.  I'm buying big so they will last another winter.  We may need some thicker socks this year.

In other news, our fosters Pickle and Summer just left.  Pickle wailed a bit in the carrier.  Poor guy.  I'm so glad they're going together.