I had a dream with Mom in it this morning. Of course, so was my great aunt who lived with us when I was a teenager. We were busy in the kitchen and I eventually convinced my great aunt who looked exhausted to sit down and I'd get her a drink. I asked coffee or water and Mom answered coffee (that's my girl). When I went to make it, my aunt started as she use to do - saying things you shouldn't say - and told me I was average. In her defense, when my aunt lived with us she had a pretty good decline into dementia going on, but everything is a little more amplified when you're a teenager.

So yeah, that's it. All that is what I struggled so hard to achieve last night. It's not often I have issues sleeping, but the past few nights have been difficult. I'm laying in bed for hours before I find sleep and waking a good bit. I'm not getting up in the morning as tired as I probably should be for the limited time I suspect I actually get in some stage of sleep, but it will catch up, guaranteed.

It looks like a post from yesterday evaporated into the mist, so I'll try to quickly recap my weekend. My Favorite Egg was in and we had a good visit. I needed to run to Altoona to take a key to the realtor, so it was nice that he found an auction down that way making the trip a little more purposeful, even if he only bought one item.

I was a bit peeved when I arrived and found the house locked up as it was the last time (meaning I could not have gotten in if I hadn't found my Mother's full set of keys to take with such that I could get in the front door). Worse still finding the alarm off and a message on the panel making it clear it hasn't been set in over a month. Am I being that much of an a**hole for making a request to ensure that the house isn't vulnerable to copper thieves? Rest assured I left the house with the alarm on.

We also went to see the Scorch Trials since I had a BOGO coupon that expired at the end of September that I refused to allow to expire unused. I guess there was a movie before this one and I was a bit lost at the beginning. It was okay, but I would have rather caught The Visit.

The girls were also very excited as we all got to go for a walk together on Sunday. I'm pretty sure that was the last of the warm days. It's time to bring down a couple of sweaters so I can survive my workday.

If I didn't know better, I'd swear the guy across the hallway is constantly on hold. I like my music too so I don't mind overhearing his, but it's literally elevator music.

On other news, I met someone having their very first Sheetz experience this morning when I stopped for some coffee. I get it - their latest coffee station can be overwhelming the first time you're there until you realize how things are set up.

"Random" on wmplayer is all about Janet Jackson and The Beatles today. It too is becoming agitating. Maybe I'm allergic to one of them?!

Dear world, I'm not typically encouraging of anything going extinct, but if we could maybe eradicate those evil yellow blooms of ragweed that would be super. So stuffed, so runny, so sneezy. I love fall, but it hurts.

I'm feeling overwhelmed. This post is going to follow my stream of thought on things I need to do and maybe you'll understand better why I am twitching.

My evenings are always loaded with my to do list (cleaning) and things I want to take advantage of (like a free photobook I finished and ordered last night). I realized too that I haven't even touched some of the things I wanted to work on at the house this summer (fixing the one deck post in specific) and here it is already cold as all get out at night. The cold evenings means that my body wants to go into hibernation mode, so getting out of bed has been a bit more of a challenge as of late. With that colder weather my back yard is full of leaves (already). I probably will need to spend a couple of weekends cleaning up outside.

Youth group is spinning back up this week too and I'm already feeling pressured on the things I cannot commit to, much less the things that simply do not interest me. Oh - and if things do progress with Mom's house I know there is more odds and ends there that needs hauled out to donate or to the trash (you know - if I can even get in to do that). (No, I haven't heard anything just yet on that front.) Christmas shopping is also weighing heavily on my mind I need to get in gear with all of that. Because I'm neurotic about trying to pay down my car I am keeping my checking balance rather low, so I FEEL strapped even though I could back off on those payments but I just refuse to.

I just need some time for me and I don't know where that is going to come from. To heck with things I want to do (like process grave photos for find a grave). I need to find time to go take more photos too before the snow starts to fly, so I have a supply for any down time this winter. I have been trying to walk in the evenings which takes up another hour that could be used to complete other tasks, but that isn't even relaxing as all I am doing is thinking about the things I need to do. When I look at the clock in the evening and it's already 10pm and I still have to shower I am ready to scream.

We're coming up against more cliffs and with the question marks about continuing resolutions etc, come October 1 I could easily have more time than I could dream of to do things at home, so I guess I shouldn't be complaining. Can I stop adulting now?

An offer came on Mom's place last week. There was a little back and forth but terms were agreed to. Now we await the inspection next week. It was built in 1925, so heaven knows anything could go, right? But I know the house is solid and was tended to for the past 40 years, so I'm hopeful we don't have anything to worry about (other than preparing to say goodbye to Home).

Prayers for a smooth and least emotionally painful transaction. This has moments that are truly overwhelming. I am very glad that it sounds like a couple who plan on living there, rather than someone one might label a slumlord. Now I really want back in there so I can just sit in the living room (and maybe my bedroom and maybe the kitchen table) and have a moment or 10.

Once again this morning I sat in a doctor's office for an hour ... this time I just said "I'm out of here." I arrived at 8:10, because they want you there early. My appointment 8:30. When I lost my crap and asked what the deal was 9:10. I'm pretty sure I was the first appointment for the laser, so what's up. I saw the doctor out in the hall. I wish I could send them a bill for _MY_ time.

Keep in mind this appointment was to make up for my previous one. I have already paid for this service. The equipment was having major issues which delayed us immensely last go round and my upper front legs weren't touched. I had an appointment for last month, which _they_ called and rescheduled to this morning.

How do doctors offices get away with this crap? My time is important. You wouldn't appreciate me being more than 40 minutes late. I'm pretty sure you'd not even bother to squeeze me in at that point.

Sunday after church I readied myself and headed out with my pumpkin no bakes to see my Favorite Egg, who was camping with his old friends just over the mountain.  I was able to stick around until the sun started to head down.

Today I took my time to relax and allow the girls a bit of time out basking in the sun.  It's been pretty darn toasty this weekend, so they didn't want to spend too long out there.  At that point I made a run out to the mall and a few other stops with the hopes of getting my Christmas shopping under way.  I can't say it was very successful.  I also stopped at Big Lots, which finally reopened after remodeling.

I'm so grateful this will be a short week, but I already feel overwhelmed at the idea of going back to work.

Day one of the long weekend down... it was a busy one.  I headed to Altoona after sleeping in a wee bit, having my coffee, and getting myself in respectable order.  I went earlier than necessary so I could visit the Texas Roadhouse for lunch and the plan was to stop at Mom's, check in on things, add a lamp to the living room, etc.  Too bad I couldn't get in - they had the extra locks in place on the back and side doors (the only two places I have keys for).  While this was agitating, the worst part was the mental melt down that went with it.  It's funny the dumb things that make loosing your childhood home settle in just a little more.

From there I headed to a birthday celebration for my best friend from Jr High!  It was so good to see her and her family.  I spent so much time with them when I was younger.  They truly are people with whom it feels like no time has passed.

While all of this was going on my nephew was off asking his gal to be his wife!  So that happened - how old am I?

I eventually headed out and met Mithy and JPrib for a quick bite and a drink as well as a good deal of chit chat at the 'bi.  On the way home the stereo on the Tib started acting up (no power on the display but it kept playing the CD).  That would be displeasing.  I guess I need to try and re-seat the detachable face and hope that is what the problem is, even though I never detach the face for it to be poorly connected.  I guess we'll see.

Two potential visiting stops were nixed for tomorrow, so that makes it a little less hectic than it could have been, but since it's rather late, I best get my rear to bed as the weekend has just begun.

I'm struggling to stay focused and productive. I am going to blame it on my Linux box missing from the docking station yesterday afternoon and this morning. Hopefully the attempts to rescue everything to a new drive before the old one completely crapped out will be successful and prompt. There is just too many things that make me want to turn to that machine for something.

We're at the first long holiday weekend for the "season". It seems like all of the holidays seem to cram in the next few months, offering quite the little reprieve. I have one vaca wiggled in there too, so I suspect the rest of the year will fly by. Who am I kidding? It's been 8 months since Mom passed, the whole year has been flying by. This weekend alone will keep me on the move, but I'll report more on that later.

Things happen in threes, right? Well I knew of two pending on this one topic and was wondering if the third was still in the works. I got it confirmed the other night that it was. Too bad I am 99.9% confident it won't happen in 4s.

If you're a particular person, which I admit I also am... you cannot say "I don't care" or punt to someone else to make a decision and then come back and have a fit that something isn't the way you would have done it. You see, you need to either shut up at this point, or recognize your own personal limitations (being too particular for your own good) and express your directives up front. This is especially critical when you are leading something and everyone must get things past you.

Further, you cannot impose your nit picks on one person but allow another to do whatever they see fit with the assumption that you will have someone else's change the first person's completed effort to meet your standards. No one wants to be on clean up duty for everyone else, especially when simply telling those people what you want up front is likely to get the first iteration to the 90% correct point. (They don't know they did it "wrong" if you never tell them, and they will continue to do it "wrong", creating a never ending supply of things that need to be reworked.)

As I learned way back when with the dish washer... my ex wanted it loaded a certain way. Great, do that... YOU... do that, because it is your insanity. Sure, I might adopt this strategy when I see the logic behind it (putting all of the forks in one section in the silverware holder and the spoons in another, etc to make it faster to unload and put away), but if I don't see the value in it you can bet if I am loading the dishwasher I'll do it in my preferred manner. At this point your options are to: shut up or load the thing yourself.

See how that works?

My mother was very particular about many things to the point that I didn't have to do much of anything in the way of chores because if she tried to make me do something and I didn't do it her way she would basically push me out of it and it never came back to me again.