One.  More.  Payment.  I have called and gotten that final dollar amount and I'm queuing up the last payment from my bank for my mortgage.  I'm so excited.  It was such a weight off my shoulders back at the old home to have this off the table.  To know that I could take a much less lucrative job if bad things happened and still make ends meet is an amazing feeling.

I guess it's time to talk about our cruise.  We were on Icon of the Seas, one of the biggest/newest ships - and quite different from the others in the features it has.  I wasn't sure going into it if I would love or hate some of the changes, and I gotta say, it was really nice.  We had a great time, despite the sadness that surrounded that timeframe.

The infinite balcony?  I liked it.  I don't know that I would like it as much over water, but over Central Park it was quite nice.  The chairs and footrest there were super comfortable and I spent a lot of time sitting and relaxing in those seats.  I don't think I sat on the couch even once.

The elevators?  Pretty cool.  You use a pad to select the floor outside of the elevator and it tells you which elevator to go to e.g., "Elevator B".  This greatly reduced wait times and the frequency of crammed/overcrowded elevators.

The shows?  Ice rink is circular, so that allowed for different things than the rectangle.  Pretty decent.  Wizard of Oz was excellent.  The Effectors was decent.  The aqua show amazing as always.  The aqua dome is up much higher on this ship than others and fully enclosed, making for a very different experience.  Comedians were good - this is the first time I've spotted an early show that I could drop Avery at Adventure Ocean and catch the comedians.

The food?  Dining room continues to become more mediocre, but there are lots of other options onboard, some included.  I loved hitting Surfside Bites instead of the Windjammer on day one for a snack - and it was so good that we ate there again.  The other free eatery at Surfside was great for breakfast too.  We went to the Hibachi in Izumi ($) for lunch and it was amazing.  We also went to Hooked ($) for dinner on the last night - it was a ton of food, quite good.  The creperie is yummy, but the quick chinese and sandwich place were less than awesome - my monte cristo was actually kind of gross.  Playmakers wings were HUGE and their fries were delicious.

The drinks?  Desserted ($) was not worth it.  It was just a messy messy milkshake that wasn't very tasty.  The lemon post had some unique and tasty drinks as did the lime and coconut - there is a frozen lime and coconut that I liked even more.  I also had 3 interesting concoctions at the Point and Feather along the promenade - can't think of what I only had maybe 2 lavender daquiris from the Schooner bar if that tells you how busy I was elsewhere trying different drinks.

The pools were JAMMED (I never did hit the adult only pool at AFT), but the water slides weren't bad despite some lines.  They are nicely shaded for the most part, so we didn't get sizzled.  Lots of waterflow, so I didn't get stuck like I did on Liberty - two are racer-style, two are tube where you ride together, and two are plunge.  The last two Avery wasn't tall enough for, but it was ok, we enjoyed the others.  Miniputt was nice.  Avery hit the rock wall several times.  Surfside was fun and also nicely shaded, but we're right on the cusp of outgrowing that area.

Cococay was lovely as always.  We returned to the free slides and the large pool for a majority of our time.  We also popped in at the little lake-like area and the beach proper.  St Maarten was super hot.  I hadn't planned a lot there, so we just jumped off for a little while and shopped around right at the port.  St Thomas was cancelled due to propulsion issues with the ship.  I hadn't planned on getting off there anyhow, so my only loss was having the ship more to ourselves.  Turns out they cancelled the sailing after ours to go for repairs.  That... and the hurricanes that have come through since?  I think our timing was amazing to get one more trip in for the year.

I really want to write a bit about our trip... but here I am this morning missing Saffy. It's been two weeks since she left this earth.  I probably did this to myself as I was digging through photos from the first year of her being with me (in Jingletown).

It's odd the dumb things you do that make you sad after loosing a pet.  I did a deeper clean on my bedroom on Saturday morning and as part of this I packed up a few extra beds that were in there to give her options for comfort.  I'm sure there is still plenty of her fur in there, as I didn't move the bed, but I felt like I was kicking her out of our bedroom.

I don't know where that Saturday motivation came from, but it also had me trimming things outside.  I now have two garbage cans full of cuttings (hopefully they'll take them from the bin and won't make me try to cram things into garbage bags).  I still need to tear down plants as the colder overnight temps are coming, but I didn't get there yet.  I will probably pull the tomatoes off later this week as I monitor the anticipated temps.

Now if I could carry that deeper clean along through the other rooms, that really needs to happen.  I'm hoping to be in a position to get someone coming to do the periodic cleans again relatively soon, I hope.  It really is a load off of my shoulders to have that support.

The piece of information missing from my post memorializing Safyre is that I wasn't here when it had to happen.  Avery and I were away on a cruise.  In the post prior perhaps you could sense my anxiety which was the uncertainty combined with my upcoming absence.  While she wasn't doing great, she was still doing the stairs w/ me walking behind her and needing a bit more support and encouragement... so I really thought we weren't to that point yet.

Within 36 hours of dropping her (and Zero) at the kennel, shortly after I got to Florida they were calling saying she didn't want to eat.  Then she wasn't standing on her own.  Then a wound on her hip, which I thought was a hot spot, opened up oozing and my favorite egg brought her home from the kennel, spent the night with her, and got her into the vet's office.  While there another wound that we had no idea existed opened up and the vet said they were bed sores.

I was able to video in and see the state she was in.  Hopefully she could hear me and/or see me.  I realized looking at her face that she was definitely hurting and it was time.  I'm grateful my favorite egg was able to be there with her since I wasn't, but I'm so heartbroken I wasn't there when she needed me.

Our trip was good, I'll post more about that after I've had a bit more time, and maybe that way was the best for me long term.  This one really really hurts.

Safyre Qwynn, Saf, Saffy, Roo, Safaroo-Kangerpuppy
She joined me on January 3, 2009, but we celebrate her "birthday" on the 4th.  I thought she was maybe a year when I got her, but it is so hard to tell, so I don't have an actual age for her.  From what I learned from the Huntingdon Humane Society is that she was initially in there as a stray, adopted out, and returned because "it just wasn't working out".  I can only imagine it was a family that was not experienced with a siberian.

I wasn't looking to get a third dog.  I don't know why I was looking at Petfinder the day I spotted her.  But I knew I needed to go see her.  When I went I took Danika with me.  They met briefly through a fence before joining together in a play area where they immediately romped and had a blast.  Danika needed a friend to play with (since she and Vixen didn't get along) and I had room in my world for this wild child.

I'd call her gray and white.  They named her Keesha at the shelter.  Those bright blue eyes and little dark spot above her mostly open face made me think of a diamond which led to the name Safyre.  She spent the first night in a crate - cried a little - and then from there she started sleeping with me (and continued to for quite some time).

She and I were good cuddle buddies.  I've never had a dog that would curl into your side so perfectly.  Then when I would flip to my side so did she - pressing our backs together.  We continued on this way for many years, until I decided to feng shui myself (for lack of better phrasing) into a real relationship.  If there wasn't room in my bed for someone, ya know?  But the fact is, Saffy made it okay for me to be single and sleeping alone.  She healed me a great deal.  Periodically we do still cuddle up and I enjoy it immensely.  While I was pregnant it was hard to cuddle just right and I think it frustrated her a good bit.  At one point she got kicked pretty solidly and then she stopped cuddling into my side with her head on my belly like she used to.

I know you shouldn't have a favorite child.  So let's just say she and I really got each other.  We needed and loved each other in the same way.  It didn't take long to realize that she was meant to be mine - that's why I spotted her when I wasn't even looking for another dog.

If my age guestimates are right that made her nearly 17 years old, and the oldest Siberian I've had in my family, beating Vixen by a few months.  She was a trooper, despite the aging issues she's suffered, like having an eye rupture!  In recent months she's had a hard time holding her poos and getting up from a sleeping position has gotten more difficult.  She was still doing the stairs with me behind her for reassurance and an occasional boost.

I took her to the kennel while I headed out on vacation with some concern, and I had gotten her a hamburger from Wendy's as a token of affection just in case earlier in the week - but no feeling that there was anything imminent.  The day of we noticed a spot at her hip that I thought was a hot spot, so I had sent meds to keep that in check.  Turns out it was a bed sore of some sort.  It ruptured the day after I took her to the kennel, so it was being tended to. Then she wasn't able to stand.  My favorite egg came and brought her home as to take her to get checked the next day and during that time another spot that we didn't know existed opened and was clearly causing her discomfort.

With the heaviest of heart I had to decide to let her go when I wasn't here.  Technology being a blessing I was able to video in so she could see and hear me and I could see her.  I am still so sad that I wasn't here with her and for her.  My heart is broken either way, but I didn't get to say the goodbye I wanted.  Coming home from vacation my house has a hole in it.  Zero is clearly noting her absence.  She will come home once she has been cremated.

Through the years...

Like I said - she was the best cuddler ever.

The little booger liked to dig when she got a chance, so we were constantly fighting.  I'd fill the hole and she'd open it back up.  This stopped in later years, thank goodness, but it is who she is.

She was quick too - one heck of a sprinter when she was young.  She would get a crazy look in her eye and then the zoomies would ensue.

She scared me a few times when she got away from me and ran off. My "nightmares" were dreams of her being missing or running away.

She was a healthy girl through the years with the exception of the eye in the past year and a steady decline as one might expect for her age.  She's had a few teeth fall out in the front, but never had broken teeth or any need for care in that regard.

She got on well with everyone - people, dogs, and even the cats that I brought into our home in the past few years.  Heck, I think she was more irritated about Zero joining us than Church.

She loved to go to the Meadows for ice cream and would jump up placing her paws on the ledge at the ordering window.

Saf even walked well on leash.  She wasn't perfect, but compared to other sibes she didn't pull much and walked along side me nicely.

There were moments when she would give me a look like my mother would.  Perhaps Mom was working through her from the great beyond.

I'll never know what her life was like before she came to me, but I hope she was as happy in her life with me as I was to have her.  Saffy will receive an individual cremation and will get her own container to stay with us forever.  I pray to see you at rainbow bridge Saffy.  You were a good girl and one of my very best friends ever.  I love you more than you could know and there would never have been enough time with you.  My heart is broken.

1/4/2008 - 09/23/2024

For a long time before my mother passed I prayed that her time would be peaceful.  I prayed she would be at home and not long-suffering.  Sure, her COPD wasn't ideal, but in the grand scheme when you see people suffer through months of cancer or years of dementia -- I still feel like my prayers were 100% answered.

I find myself saying similar prayers for Saffy.  It's been a bad 24 hours for her and she's really struggling.   She was pacing the room at 5am and didn't go when I brought her down and took her out.  This time she doesn't want to eat, even the  moist food.  I did get some pain meds in her, even though they are supposed to be taken with food, so she is at least resting now instead of trying to pace and slipping/sliding about.

I know it's rare that a decision doesn't need to be made for a pet.  The whole peaceful passing in their sleep thing doesn't tend to happen, but it could, right?  The thought of taking the very best buddy I've had to a vet's office just isn't okay.  I've been through it 3 times.  I watched and tried to comfort Vixen as she fought the sedative.  I sat beside Satin and Danika as they passed, unable to stand up on their own -- Danika in the back of my car thanks to COVID and the vet not allowing people into the building.  I just want Saffy to be here at home.  I suspect a point will come when I know she needs my help and I will of course, do what is right for her so she doesn't suffer, but I hate it.  Here's praying she bounces back like she did this time last year or that resolution comes quickly.  Speaking of last year (yes it was late August), I really thought she was gone then.  Since she's had her struggles, like with her eye and some days were better than others, but she kept pressing on.

Barnabas had his first trip to the vet (under my care) today.  Can you believe he's been here for a full year?  I was worried he wouldn't be the angel that Church is at the vet since Barney tends to disappear if someone he doesn't know comes to the house.  Much like Church, he was willing to walk right into the carrier (the time using the carrier when he was a foster paid off!) and he sang the song of his people on the drive to the vet.  At the office he wasn't quite as chill, but didn't have an issue at all.

I learned he doesn't have a few of his front teeth, which is interesting. We also need to keep an eye on his weight, which doesn't overly surprise me.  So proud of my little black voids.

Saffy has been hanging in there.  Some days are better than others, that's for sure, but she's still walking the stairs on her own with me behind her.  As to not leave him out I will say that Zero is still his crazy self.  My very routine-based nature helps keep some of his insanity in check... unless it's time for dinner.

As to the garden, the tomatoes are all coming in a steady stream now.  The lantern flies are insane here.  They're here and there on the house and also sitting in piles, I can hit 4-6 in one swat of the fly swatter.  Sitting outside you periodically get hit by one that jumps onto you, it's kind of unnerving.  I've probably killed over 100 of them each warm day for weeks at this point.  Tonight I sat out back and noted some large black ants coming and going, so I'm trying to carefully put treatment out for that.  Then I saw wasps going into the brown paper I have hanging on the deck to deter the carpenter bees!

Work is busy.  Time keeps flying by on me and I'm trying to keep up.

Am I making the kid soft?

The past few nights have been cooler, so I have turned off the AC and opened the windows.  The upstairs does get a bit warmer, it's true, but nothing like the heat of the summer when I was a kid and we didn't have central air.  I remember laying in bed unable to sleep from the heat. Run the window AC just long enough to cool it down and then turn it off and try to fall asleep.

Avery has gotten back out of bed 2x so far tonight because she's warm.  She does have a fan running in her room and I would put money down that her room is a good 10-15 degrees cooler than the memories I am reflecting on.

This weekend I started trimming things back as I do leading into the fall.  4 dog food bags full of russian sage, a dead cucumber plant, brown fronds from decorative plants in the back, and dead sunflowers.  There are many more bags where that came from.

The weather has taken a cooler turn getting us into the upper 40s at night.  Hopefully the nice weather can hang on so I can get the rest of my tomatoes ripening on the vines. I also had some lettuce seed itself that is growing nicely at the moment, so I'd like to get something out of that.  I have 3 green peppers out there that could probably be plucked at any point, one very nicely sized white onion, and a good handful of snap peas.  The rest is tomatoes tomatoes tomatoes - and I'm here for it.

With the CSA baskets I've been cooking up green beans and peppers this week. I tried cooking up the cherry peppers .... dang they're hot, I just can't do it.  Hopefully neighbors are willing to give them a try tomorrow.  I also made some zucchini fritters last night that turned out quite tasty.

With the long weekend I finally got caught up on laundry and checked off a few things on the to do list.  We also hit the pool with Avery's bestie - a last minute plan that I'm grateful for.  This was my first visit to the pool this year.

Avery returns to the podiatrist on Thursday, hopefully her wart is gone, I don't want her to suffer the numbing and removal.  She did take the ear piercing like a champ -- and they remain pain free and looking healthy!

Poor Saf.  We've been getting her nails trimmed regularly so her feet aren't sliding out from under her.  Well, when she's tired or feeling weak she drags her hind foot a bit.  A recent trim and a bit of a drag on the concrete and she's gotten herself bloody.  On one hand it's a good thing, because this means she has the energy to pace/do loops.

I noticed a bit of blood on the back stairs and deck the other day, but when I checked everyone's feet they looked ok.  Today there is defn more.  I am guessing the one was trimmed just a little too far which is a bad combo with a bit of a drag thanks to the heat really taking it out of her.  I cleaned her up and put one of the little booties on that foot.  Hopefully that will help her out.  Watching her get old stinks.

We were supposed to run tonight for Avery's first singing lesson, but the instructor messaged that she isn't feeling well.  That's a bit of a mixed bag since I had ordered groceries for pickup at the end of the lesson; I guess we're still running up to that plaza.

My bestie is now 7.  She had a great party this weekend with her friends and given her desired theme (Halloween) I am prepped a bit earlier than normal for Halloween.

School is in full swing now too.  It's odd that she's gone, but I get a little more focus on work.

How quickly the summer flew by.  It's officially time to start trimming things back outside every week.  I tore down the plants that were done or not looking promising (broccoli, pumpkin).  The tomatoes are browning and finally turning enough to make it hard to keep up in consumption -- but we'll give it a go or make a small batch of sauce.

This past CSA bag came with cherry hot peppers. I'm hoping they won't kill me -- so I'm looking for a recipe.  One of my favorite egg's uncles made stuffed ones at a gathering at one point - they were amazing.  I should just ask for that recipe!

I don't think I commented on this but I just made a call on it, so I have official information.  I am booked for Icon of the Seas.  I did so w/ a Surfside guarantee and I was excited because it is a new neighborhood and right up the alley for someone traveling with a 7 year old.  Historically on the Oasis class this area was the Boardwalk balcony and it was considered to be an upgrade from Central Park balconies.

Well, Royal has flipped things a bit and I disagree with it strongly.  When my guarantee was assigned I got a Central Park room.  I called the TA and they said it was an "upgrade".  I stewed for a while and today finally called RC to ask/confirm that this is the case.  It is, and that's pretty dumb in my book.

I mean, Central Park is fine if that's what I got a sweet deal on -- at least it was when you got an actual balcony and not just a window that opens and sucks all of the air conditioning out of your room.  No one wants these rooms, it's been widely known since Icon started sailing.  If you want to upgrade me and me not be displeased with it -- put me in an over water balcony.  Central Park is a downgrade, and it was even before the change to infinite balconies.

At one point RC had "upgrade preferences" that you could configure.  Basically you could say "if I'm in an interior and you have an available upgrade to a promenade view interior I do or do not want that to happen".  I'm pretty sure options included changes when in neighborhood balconies.  They've tossed those old preferences -- and never mentioned that they were now OBE.

Either way, I get to go on a cruise -- I will keep on cruising, but for sure I will warn people that they could get hosed w/ this type of a guarantee AND I will be sure to mention this in my post cruise survey (who knows I might end up thinking the Central Park infinite balcony is the best thing since sliced bread.  I doubt it, but I might.)

Here it is, the end of the last weekend before school starts.  I managed a bit of time to get into the hot tub to relax.

I spent a bit of time tidying browned leaves etc out back today.  I will count that as a step to ready for next weekend.  Along with the brown/dead pieces so went the broccoli and cauliflower -- they weren't going to do anything for me -- and the lettuce that went to seed.  Tomatoes are a very regular gather now.  I am glad I have a variety of plants as the sweet 100s aren't producing a ton.

With company coming on Saturday and Sunday this coming weekend I need to spend time each evening tidying and getting things in order. I also need to pull out the Halloween decorations -- a Halloween themed birthday party is an excellent excuse to get decorating.

Kiddo's birthday is in two weeks. If I told you I just started trying to figure out what we're doing for it I feel like you wouldn't believe me, at least not if you know me well.  Sorry to say, but you'd be wrong.  I literally just made a little invitation graphic to send to a few of her friends.  Just a low-key small gathering here.  Hopefully we will have nice weather and can play outside.  This means I have stuff to get done around here inside and outside.  I also need to get some things ordered for favors etc.

Avery told me the other day she wanted a Halloween theme.  Yes girl.  I can do that.  Of course whatever bakery I turn to will think we're crazy, but I'm good with that.